CALL OF HAM

Jazz and Kris have recently discovered the delights of Call of Duty online play and have been customising their own profiles.

*Kris & Jazz engaged in online Team Deathmatch as Charlie comes home*

Charlie : “Am I ever going to be able to play my own damn console?!”

Kris & Jazz *simultaneously without pause*: “NO!”

GLAD HAM

The dinner time discussion had turned to recounting events throughout the day.

“Ebony wants to know when she will hit adulthood so the pimples will go away” Jazz explained. Her younger sister had queried the process of becoming an adult, wondering when the lingering pubescent trait would finally disappear leaving her skin clear.

“I don’t know if I will ever grow up” Kris replied with a shrug.

“I just wish I would grow up already” responded Jazz. She was studying to become a doctor, a lengthy process which would see at least eight years of study, prac and stress that she would rather have behind her already.

The girls shrugged off the momentary concern and continued to joke about the small things that lingered from their teen years. They still watched cartoons both new and old, purchased comical shirts and collectables from stores, and still had that spark that lit their minds with creative flare.

The news broadcast on the television that the Glad brand of cling-wrap the girls had once used was returning to its old packaging making it easier to use.

“I can’t believe this is news” remarked Charlie shaking his head. The girls instantly defended the segment.

“Are you kidding!?” exclaimed Jazz. “They moved the cutter to a different spot on the box that made it impossible to rip off the glad wrap without it breaking off uneven and sticking to everything it shouldn’t!”

“But how is this news?” replied Charlie.

“Well we started trying different brands of cling-wrap when we didn’t like the modified packaging, so now it has gone back to being convenient, consumers will be happy again and we will probably get that brand again as well” Kris explained.

Charlie shrugged and finished with a last ditch comment that it still didn’t make it news worthy material.

It later occurred to Kris when she recounted this discussion that they had in fact already, grown up.

DREAM JOURNAL – VILLAGE OF THE FAE

In the village ran a great and wide dirt road. Though it ran through the village and was the main road which was used to enter, it actually lay on the outskirts bordering a vast forrest. Though much of the land was covered in snow the dirt road was only partially so. Carved out were the tracks of carriages that had made their way back and forth.

On the left hand side of the road were the houses considered less than desirable. They rose several stories high and backed onto the forest which was dense and green. Though these houses were elaborate and carefully designed they were shadowed by the residences on the opposite side of the road.

On the opposite side of the road were houses built of brick that covered larger areas of land though did not rise so high. They were elaborately designed, spacious, the greater residences that divulged wealth and prosperity yet hid secrets. They cascaded into the valley below neighbouring closely to one another. Though these families had wealth the land these houses sat on could only provide a house and not elaborate gardens.

They appeared colder than the houses on the other side on the road, made of grey stones and roof tops covered in a light frosting of snow.

There were four of us. Two girls, two boys, all in our late teens to early twenties. Our lives were entwined by society and connected by friendship. Though I knew all of their stories and witnessed them all, I only truly experienced the life of one girl.

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HAM IN THE HOUSE

Watching singing scene in Dollhouse.

*Charlie cringes and carries on*

Kris: “What’s the matter?”

Charlie: “I hate singing in TV shows…”

Kris: “YOU DIDN’T SEEM TO HAVE A PROBLEM WHEN SHE WAS SINGING IN THE EARLIER SCENE IN ONLY HER KNICKERS!”

Charlie: “THAT WAS DIFFERENT!”

HAM MUFFINS

Kris: “I just snacked on one of the muffins, it was so good!”

*Charlie laughs*

Kris: “Whats funny?”

Charlie: “Nothing nothing, just my head in the gutter…”

*Kris has sudden realisation of alternative meaning for a ‘muffin’*

Kris: “Eeeewwwww!”

DREAM JOURNAL – THE KEEPER

It was unlike any creature I have ever known. The head was too large and perfectly spherical to be human. It looked as though a million fine cocoons had been combined and painted the same shade of charcoal. Fuzzy around the edges, as if fine hairs protruded in every direction.

Was it vibrating? Though the creature stood still the head seemed to be moving but not as if it was trying to go somewhere or turn. It was as if I were missing frames of memory and it appeared to jump millimetres back and forth between two positions on the shoulders though never actually moving.

Glowing yellow eyes sat in on the head as if they had been painted on yet seeming to glow from within. Even though I was frightened I found I could not look away.

A hat made of twigs sat upon its head. It rose to a high cone that resembled a witches with a rim of twigs that followed the cone around full and extended over the front and back of the creatures head.

A large fabric covered the rest of the creature from the neck to the ground. Like a great poncho without holes for arms meant to eternally conceal what lie beneath.

I woke from my daze with my brow furrowed. I wondered what it was, where it was, and in the midst of my confusion the words dream keeper echoed in my mind.